This morning, anticipating that my English muffin would soon be popping from the toaster, I went to the cupboard for a plate. Sitting out on the countertop was what appeared to be a clean plate, probably left out accidently by whoever unloaded the dishwasher. Might as well use that one, right?

I picked up the plate to inspect it carefully, just to make sure it was clean. Turning it in the light, I discovered that it was covered in lick marks. It was a pretty thorough job; couldn’t tell what had been licked. I put it in the dishwasher, got out a clean plate, and tried not to think too much about it.

*Shudder*

We just celebrated Mother’s Day, my 18th. Eighteen years of Mom Moments; of licked-clean plates, and dirty footprints on the carpet, and tending hurts, and teaching, and helping, and learning to let go. And, if you connect the dots, you’ll see that Dirk and I have something this year that we haven’t had before as parents: an 18-year-old, getting ready to graduate from high school.

I suddenly find myself in that group that looks a bit witless, a bit stunned, and says, “Graduating already? How did that happen? Time went so fast, I can hardly believe it.” You feel silly saying it, because it’s too obvious, too cliché. But what else is there to say?

I’m so excited for Jenna. This past year has been busy making preparations for graduation, and college, and so many new things coming up. It’s been a positive experience, and I wouldn’t change a thing. But sometimes, like this morning when I looked at that plate, it all feels a little sad. Not that I think that Jenna licked that particular plate (I can see her cringing at me leaving that unclarified), but I clearly remember the little girl she used to be who would do just that.

Gone is my little girl who spent a year believing that she was Winnie the Pooh and calling me Christopher Robin. Gone is my buddy who would curl up with me to read book after book after book, until she learned to read herself, and found she could read faster without me. She’s gone, and pretty soon our teenaged Jenna will be gone, too. We’ll look at pictures and say, “Wow, look how young she was then!” Isn’t that what people say about us?

With all the excitement and planning for the future, there’s that elephant-in-the-room feeling: She’s leaving. She’s moving off into adulthood, into a time where we’ll have to make an effort to know what’s happening in her life, because she won’t be living it full time under our roof.

For us, Jenna’s graduation is Child Leaving Home, Part 1 of 5. While we’re excited and worried and know we’re going to miss her, Dirk and I have four other kids at home to keep us company and leave out licked-clean plates and other eyebrow-raising messes to find. (Well, and then there’s always Dirk to do that, I guess.) For some of you, it’s your youngest child graduating, or your only child. My heart goes out to you, because there is so much happening so quickly. It’s wonderful, but there are the stressful and sad parts of it all.

Have I said it’s wonderful? Because it truly is.

Well, I’ve had my quiet reflection. Moving on to more productive things, like graduation announcements, and packing lists for college, and spending quality time with our sweet girl, just because.

Good luck, class of 2010! We send you off with a bounty of love and hope, which you will not comprehend until you are in your own 18th year of parenthood, looking at a well-licked plate and wondering how the years went by so quickly.