By RICHARD D. OXLEY
and KIPP ROBERTSON
North Kitsap Herald

POULSBO — Carol Tong has had a difficult year. Her friends are now asking the community to help.

The Nov. 21 burglary of her Poulsbo home occurred just under a year after her son Evan Tong committed suicide. She didn’t work for a period of months and has since lived paycheck to paycheck. That has put a financial strain on her family and she has struggled to keep her home.

“I’ve raised my children in my home and I don’t want to lose it,” Tong said.

When burglars scavenged her home, they picked through valuables, taking jewelry, boxes, and cash that Tong saved to make her next mortgage payment.

Then there’s the boxes that Tong collects, one being a jewelry box her uncle brought back from serving overseas in the military. She has had it since she was 8. That box was taken. In it was her late son’s baby teeth, as well as her daughter’s.

“That, to me, was sentimental because I had so few things left of him,” she said.

Also stolen: a wedding ring she planned to give to her daughter one day.

But it’s not just the financial loss that is being felt, it’s also the sentimental, compounded by the death of her son in December 2013.

Eleven months after his passing, Tong is grieving again.

“They took my son’s old phone that had pictures on them that I hadn’t completely transferred over to my phone yet,” Tong said.

Evan’s wallet, which she kept under her mattress, is also gone.

“They even messed with my son’s urn, with his ashes,” Tong said. “It’s on the table in my living room. They tried to get into that.”

The burglary
Tong is grateful for some things, however. Her father, who was possibly around the home during the time of the burglary, was not harmed. Her daughter was away — en route home from college, facing slow traffic over the Cascade Mountains.

Tong’s father, however, may have been in the home during the theft. He came over to run a load of laundry that day.

“They were either in the house while my dad was doing his laundry or went out the window and came in after he finished his laundry because my room was completely ransacked,” she said.

Tong’s room wasn’t ransacked when her father came over, she said. Her father did notice, however, some papers were strewn about the floor, but assumed that a family cat had made the mess. The window screen in Evan’s old room was pushed inside his room, but nothing else was amiss. Her father then left.

Hours later, Tong returned home from work. Her home was further tossed about and her valuables were stolen.

She said that of all the things taken, she would like the burglars to return the sentimental box and the things that she kept of her late son.

“Please bring me back my boxes with the things they don’t want,” she said she would ask the thieves. “They would know.”

A way to help
A Wish Fund through Giveforward (www.giveforward.com) was created to help Carol. The goal is to raise $10,000. As of Nov. 25, $1,550 from 21 donations was raised, according to the fund’s Web page.

“I had cash in my dresser drawer that I was going to pay my mortgage with this month, and my friend that I talked with about this, he set this fund up so that I could pay my mortgage,” Tong said. “I’ve been fighting to keep my home.”

The fund was set up by Tong’s friend, Richard Koven. He has known Tong for more than 10 years, he said. Tong’s children have been friends with Koven’s children “for years,” he said.

“There was a period of time when I was going through turmoil with my personal life and she [helped me],” Koven said. “Now, fast forward and I’m in a good place … she’s had a lot of tragedy.”

Koven said Tong’s home was a sort of safe haven for local children and teenagers. It became a place to hang out after school. After work, Tong would come home, count all the people at her house, and make dinner, Koven said.

“It was just a safe place,” he said. “She just gave and never took back for herself.”

After the burglary, Koven said he saw social media posts from Tong that didn’t fit — feelings of despair. It was not typical.

“It’s just so violating,” Koven said of the burglary.

The Kovens saw an outpouring of support for Tong on social media after the burglary. They decided to create the Giveforward site to provide another tool for the community to show support.

“All these people love her and want to know how to help,” Koven said. “This is the way I felt we could come together as a community and help her.

“It’s not just the money … it’s the sense of community and love.”