POULSBO — A man shot and killed by Poulsbo police. An 8-year-old shot and critically injured at school by a handgun in a classmate’s backpack. Two murders. Two traffic deaths. A suicide.
It’s been a tragic month. If you are grieving and need someone to talk to, or if you need help talking to your children about what’s happened, there are a lot of resources available.
– Call 2-1-1. Peninsula 2-1-1 can help you access a variety of essential services. People can call and get connected to health and human service agencies, and get referrals and other assistance.
“We connect people with community resources,” said Cory Derenburger, 2-1-1 database manager. “By calling us, people have access to our database of information. 2-1-1 is a good connection to find out what help is available.”
2-1-1 accommodates 1,100 to 1,200 callers a month.
– Call Crisis Clinic of the Peninsulas, (360) 415-5815. The Crisis Clinic is a 24-hour telephone service that provides a “listening ear” to people who feel they have nowhere else to turn. Along with crisis intervention, the clinic provides referrals to community services when appropriate.
– Call the Parenting Hotline, (800) 932-4673. The Parent Trust for Washington Children offers free or low-cost classes, coaching and workshops. Parenting coaches are available on the phone Monday through Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Visit www.parenttrust.org for parenting tip sheets and videos.
“It’s not a crisis line, it’s not a referral line, it’s a help line,” parenting coach Julie Taheri said. “We have people available to help Monday through Friday. It’s not 24/7, but if you leave a message we’ll call you back as soon as possible.”
Taheri said talking to children about death and violence can be difficult, because in most cases they haven’t even thought about those subjects yet. “It’s something we understand and we can help,” she said.
– Call Peninsula Community Health Services, (360) 478-2366. PCHS helps people address depression and other emotional issues, often in collaboration with the individual’s primary care provider. Hours: Monday through Friday, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m.
It’s relatively easy for children to be exposed to violence in the community, whether by word of mouth on the school playground or on the Internet or TV. Teri McDaniel, a mom of three who serves as secretary of the Suquamish Elementary PTSA, said she and her children talk — without unnecessary details — about events.
“We talk about how sad these things are, how tragic things can occur, and how it often comes from poor choices,” she said. “You want to empower them with information. You want them to be aware but not consumed with fear.”
Taheri agreed. “The most important thing is to let children ask questions, let them know that question is too silly and that they can ask any question they want of ask parent or support person. It really helps to understand what they’re going through. If they’re not bringing it up, it’s OK to ask them, ‘A really bad thing happened. Do you want to talk about it?’ You can’t pretend it didn’t happened. Unfortunately, they’re faced with brutal realities probably earlier than they need to be.”
McDaniel said North Kitsap Fire & Rescue has a program in which children in grades K-3 talk about safety, including gun safety — if you see a gun, don’t touch it, tell an adult.
“So, they got a little exposure to (gun safety),” she said of her children.
