(EDITOR’S NOTE: This letter to families of Kingston’s Wolfle Elementary students was sent home in the school’s March 2007 newsletter, after seven young students from South Korea returned home in late February. They had arrived in Kingston last December with a chaperone and were here to study at the school and see how Americans live.)
It was a sad day (the end of Feburary) when our seven students from South Korea said good-bye and prepared for the long trip back home. Having been here since early December, they have impacted our lives in so many ways. I would like to share some of what we learned from them, and they from us.
When I asked the kids what they will miss most about their experiences here, without exception they all responded (many with tears in their eyes): how nice everyone is. This surprised me just a tad. It was a nice sentiment, but they did so many cool things, visited so many exciting and unique places. Yet, their greatest memories will be how nice the kids and teachers are. Of the friends they made. I talked to Jayne (Chae), their (chaperone), about this. My summary below is simplified but it will give you the main gist of our conservations.
In South Korea, and much of Asia, there is a huge pressure to do well in school. A student’s future path is determined for them by sixth grade. While they are not in class a full 12 hours a day, they do focus on academics and learning almost a full 10-12 hours a day. They spend most of their summer prior to 6th grade preparing for exams that will determine if they go to college, what kind of college, or college at all.
The pressure is huge – both on the kids and their families. Often, your status is based on what school your kids go to. Suicide rates are high. Emotional breakdowns are high. Kids are not nice to each other … they are often cutthroat and competitive and always trying to “one up” each other. Teachers, while highly respected, are very strict and often demeaning towards kids.
This is the environment these children expected when they came to America. Yet, people here were nice. They were friendly. They were inviting and trusting and open. Teachers were actually fun and often funny and knew their students personally. Jayne told me that at home, they cannot get the kids out of bed in the morning to go to school. Here, even after three months, the kids were up before 6 a.m. almost every day waiting and anxious to go to school. They hated snow days!
So what does this mean? The focus of the American education system has been to copy that of the Asian system – to be competitive and not lag behind. High stakes accountability and standards. To not lose our edge.
And so we have No Child Left Behind (NCLB) and the demands of the (Washington Assessment of Student Learning tests) placed in our laps. But what is the cost? NCLB and the WASL are not bad in themselves, so long as we do not take them to the extreme of taking the joy out of living and learning; so that we do not lose that personal touch that we make with each other, the ever important relationship building.
I often tell people: When our kids leave Wolfle, they will not remember learning math or reading. But they will have lifelong, meaningful memories and experiences that will help shape who and what they are from people and experiences they shared while here.
It is commonly believed that the beauty and power of the American school system and the American people, is their imagination and creativity; ability to think outside the box, to solve problems, to come up with new and innovative ideas. The power of other systems outside the U.S. is to take our ideas and find ways to perfect them, to make them more cheaply, etc. But without the idea first, we have nothing. And new ideas come from working with each other, sharing insights, experiences, challenging the status quo but not cutting it down or trying to always “one up” each other. It is in relationships. In kindness. In the ability to feel safe to take risks and even to fail. It comes from cultivating the visual arts and music and theater and physical education. It comes from study of history and social studies so that we have a clear idea where we came from and where we are going. And while philosophy is not a curriculum we teach in elementary school, it is ever important to understanding ourselves, our ethics and morality and why we do, or should do, what we do.
Personally, I am thrilled that these seven first- through fifth-graders are going home not with memories of Disneyland, the grandeur of Safeco Field, the marvel of the Space Needle, the vast green beauty of Puget Sound (they have very little grass or trees where they live in Seoul and none of these at school), or even the quality of our educational system.
They are going home with memories of kindness, people working cooperatively together, and of friendship. These are what will make our world a better place for us all.
